Speaking the Truth in Love
by Richard C. Sims, Jr.
The following article appeared in the November 2001 edition of Straitway, a newsletter published monthly and offered free of charge. If you wish to subscribe to Straitway, email Glenn Melton.
In Ephesians 4:15 Paul wrote, "but speaking the truth in love, we are to grow up in all aspects into Him, who is the head, even Christ. " (NASB). What does Paul mean by "speaking the truth in love?" Looking at the phrase in the Greek we note "speaking the truth" comes from "aleteeno" concerning which Vine says, "signifies to deal faithfully or truly with someone." The emphasis is on truth, not speaking. Love is active good will as shown by Paul in 1 Corinthians 13 and Colossians 3:12-14.
Perhaps the best commentary on "speaking the truth in love" is found in examining the preaching and teaching of Paul, himself. To young Timothy Paul wrote, "And the Lord's bond-servant must not be quarrelsome, but be kind to all, able to teach, patient when wronged, with gentleness correcting those who are in opposition, if perhaps God may grant them repentance leading to the knowledge of the truth, and they may come to their senses and escape from the snare of the devil, having been held captive by him to do his will," 2 Timothy 2:24-26.
People are different and the preacher must be flexible in his approach. Some people need to be reproved, some rebuked, and some exhorted. ALl need to be shown "great patience and instruction," 2 Timothy 4:2. Paul preached the "whole purpose of God," Acts 20:27, and he preached the same thing in all churches, 1 Corinthians 4:17; 7:17. We must follow his example, 1 Corinthians 11:1.
Speaking the truth in love sometimes involves being blunt with those opposing the truth. Paul told Elymas, "You who are full of all deceit and fraud, you son of the devil, you enemy of all righteousness, will you not cease to make crooked the straight ways of the Lord?" Acts 13:10.
Speaking the truth in love sometimes involves pointing out sin. Paul felt love for the brethren at Corinth and he hated causing them sorrow, 2 Corinthians 2:4, but the truth had to be taught, 1 Corinthians 5:1-8; 7:1-16. Brethren, preach the truth, give godly sorrow a change to produce repentance, 2 Corinthians 7:8-11.
Sometimes, speaking the truth in love requires that those in error be identified by name, 1 Timothy 1:20; 2 Timothy 4:10, 14-15. Even a public confrontation, "in the presence of all" may be called for, as Paul confronted Peter in Galatains 2:14.
At times, we have to recognize that even "speaking the truth in love" does not convert the sinner and we must move on as Paul did in Acts 13:46 and Acts 18:6. If the sinner is a Christian who refuses to repent, he must be marked, Matthew 18:15-17; Romans 16:17-18; Titus 3:10-11; 2 Thessalonians 3:14-15.
The goal of speaking the truth in love, is that "we are to grow up in all aspects into Him, who is the head, even Christ," Ephesians 4:15. We do not show love for God or man when we change the gospel, Gal. 1:6-10. A watered down gospel may sound like love and may give a sense of security. It may even give a warm fuzzy feeling. But, only the truth, the whole truth and nothing but the truth will save us and bring us to maturity in Christ, John 8:32; John 17:17.
"Better is open rebuke than love concealed, faithful are the wounds of a friend, but deceitful are the kisses of an enemy" Proverbs 27:5-6
Posted by David F. Sims, doing my part to "turn the world upside down" (Acts 17:6)
All quotes taken from the New American Standard Bible, unless otherwise stated.
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